San Diego

Matt and I are actually in San Diego on a sail boat with his Uncle Bob and Aunt Nancy, and having a wonderful time. They offered to let us come out and get away, and we took them up on it. We flew out here on Monday. We sailed the harbor Tuesday, and took a longer sail out to sea today to see how I would feel. Tomorrow we leave early in the morning for Oceanside, and then Newport and finally Catalina Island! So far so good, as far as sea sickness for me. Matt has sailed before with them, but I never have and with my trouble getting car sick all the time, I was very nervous. I did fine going out, but coming back the wind changed and I didn’t do as well. But, I recovered and I know to take my meds tomorrow morning first thing! We set sail at 6:30 am. I am excited, and thankful and a little nervous. I like sailing, though. It is slow and relaxing. Peaceful and serene. God feels close, and so do our boys. Matt said today he keeps drawing them in his head. I hope he will draw them one day, I am sure he could draw them even more beautiful then they were. I see them in my dreams, and they are so sweet and happy. It is hard to believe it has been over 7 weeks now since I held them in my arms and kissed their soft skin. But it has been, and I am still here and I am still surviving. In fact, I am more than surviving. I am doing much better than I was a couple weeks ago. This trip is for us, to spend time together as a couple and have no stress on us. Just concentrate on loving each other and relaxing. To get away from the constant reminders. But what is so wonderful is that we see what God has made all around us, and that reminds us that he also made our boys, his boys. So perfect and in his image and for his purpose. We are so blessed by what they have brought to our lives. I would not have done it any differently than we did it. There is still part of me that day dreams about taking care of them , hearing them cry and seeing them smile, but I wouldn’t take them from God for all of the money in the world. It wasn’t meant to be that way, that was not part of God’s plan. What we wanted all along was God’s will, and that is what happened. I guess it would have happened that way no matter what, but it all felt right and has left an inner peace somewhere deep down in my heart that tells me everything is right and the way it should be.

I will try to post another update if I can while we are out here. I included a few pictures from our sail today, so enjoy them! Most of you will be receiving something from us this week, and we hope you enjoy the pictures of the beautiful Joshua and Caleb. We had a hard time picking a few out, they are all so good!! LOVE YOU ALL!!